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In Honor of my Funny, Smart, Beautiful and Supportive Sister
So last night I’m having a nervous breakdown. The kind that comes once every 10 years or so. To say that I was apoplectic would be an understatement. This is how I felt: I was laying in bed, feet...
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To all the Smokes I’ve loved before…
…you can go suck it because I beat you!!!! I am SO PROUD OF MYSELF!!! I’ve been more stressed the last few weeks (as you guys know) then I’ve been in a looooooong time. And even though hari kari was...
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Oh yeah…it’s NOOKIE-TIME!
Yep…it’s that time again. My latest yarn on all things nookie related is out, about and ready to be read by all you perverts out there. ;) Kidding! Well, it is ready to read, but you don’t have to be a...
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My funky new living room!
As you guys know, the hubby and I have been remodeling the house for a few years. We have this living area (that no one EVER sits in!) when you first walk in. It’s a fairly small area which is why we...
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What the Shit is This?
. Dear Cracker Jack people, You can suck it! What kind of rip off, jacked up “prize” is this? I’ll tell ya, it’s a shit prize. No. It’s not a prize. It’s a turd in a box of cheap popcorn with nuts so...
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My Very Favorite Thing
. I would like to introduce you all to my favorite thing on earth (save for things that breathe). Drum roll please…. (Yes, you can click below to hear an actual drum roll. Yes, because I’m a doofus!)...
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Favorite New Crap to Buy
Howdy and Happy New Year! Yep, the sentiment is a bit late, but I still hope you all had and will have a happy one. Now for the scoop. Every once in a while I do a post that details some fabulous...
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Ahhhh…the good ol’ days
I got to thinking tonight, after visiting a Facebook page dedicated to the small town I grew up in, about how much fun it was to grow up in the 80s as a teenager. Yeah, we didn’t have the Internet...
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How to Smell Like a Stripper, Have Silky Hair, Wash Your Hair Less Often, and...
Last week I was at the doctor’s, waiting in the lobby and twiddling my thumbs, when this lovely lady approached me and told me that I have gorgeous hair. After blushing and telling her that she’d made...
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You are my sunshine…my only sunshine…
You guys know that in addition to being a foul-mouthed trollop, I’m also a squishy little cuddle bun bun with my hubby. We text each other a few times during the day just to say, “I love you, Stinker!”...
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Musings of an Old Broad on her Birthday
As always, I am truly amazed and thankful to have such a blessed life. That I’ve reached 46 (WHAT THE FUCK??? HOW AM I NOT STILL 22???) and am, for the most part, healthy, and for the full part, happy,...
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Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy New Year, etc… :)
Hi everyone! Yeah, I know. It’s been forever. There are behind the scenes reasons for my absence, but I wanted to reach out this holiday season and let all of you know that I hope you are doing well,...
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Can I ask for a few prayers?
As we all know, I’m old. Methuselah and I are 2nd cousins. Yep. That old. And with that age comes body parts that wanna fall off (or out in this case). It looks like I’ll be getting a full...
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Pre-surgical update (From HELL!) ;)
First and foremost, thanks so much to all of you for your wonderful prayers and well wishes. It means the world to me. Surgery is in 19 hours and to be quite frank, I’m a wee bit scared. So any...
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Musings of an Old Hag (but an alive one) on her (almost) Birthday
First and foremost, massive hugs and love to all of you for your many emails, flowers and other goodies you sent to the hospital to cheer me up and the tons of prayers that most certainly kept me alive...
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What the Shit is This?
. Dear Cracker Jack people, You can suck it! What kind of rip off, jacked up “prize” is this? I’ll tell ya, it’s a shit prize. No. It’s not a prize. It’s a turd in a box of cheap popcorn with nuts so...
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Even after the year I’ve had… still so much thankfulness
I originally posted this on Facebook, but a friend suggested I put it here too since I have the most wonderful blogging family EVER!!!! I totally agreed, as I love you guys to no end. So, here goes....
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Truth 2: Be Brave
I am quite literally going to be braver in this post than I’ve EVER been in my life (excluding evil doctor-related things). For most of my life I’ve had an insane fear, I’m mean a severe PHOBIA of...
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Truth 4: People are fuckin’ hysterical
Warning, this one is a little long, so grab a coffee or a smoke, but this is one of my favorites thus far. For some reason, people tend to email me directly instead of commenting on my post or on...
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